Friday, July 29, 2016

The End is Near

One month since you heard from me last.

Time seems slip away so quickly, doesn't it?

Already, I'm almost done with school. Only one week left. Our group project, our final project, is done. Mostly. There are still some tweaks and last minute adjustments we can work on during next week, when we aren't too busy doing whatever it is we do in the final week.

There will be job prepping, interview prepping and other things. There will be a "Meet & Hire" lunch next Thursday where people representing companies looking for web developers will come and meet us. Some of us might get hired.

This makes me nervous, but not for the reasons you may be thinking. Technically, I already have a job lined up, which is fortunate, because our financial situation can accurately be compared to those bits in cartoons when a character opens their wallet and a small, sad moth flies out. Or is it a fly?

I was fortunate enough to be chosen from my class to be a mentor for the next class, beginning shortly after mine ends. I'm excited to help give back, to help others, and be a slightly larger part of DevMountain. Part of the decision process was 'job readiness' or 'hireability' (I'm not sure if that's an actual word, but it's fun to say). I was one of three people chosen, out of several from my class, which has served as a bit of confidence boost.

So, no. It isn't the will I/won't I get a job from the meet and hire, but simple fact that there will be people. Lots of people. Looking and me, amongst others, and judging. Scrutinizing our work. It's silly, I know, but I don't feel like my personal project is quite portfolio ready and I'm not sure how much time I'll have between now and then to make it so.

Also, people. Lots of them. Did I mention that? People don't necessarily make me nervous, but talking to them does. And that is what will be expected.

I'm awful when it comes to talking to people. Truly, I am. It is, beyond the shadow of a doubt, one of the things I am worst at. My small talk is stunted and awkward. It's also quite murderous, as it kills almost every potential conversation it peeks its head into. My wife tells me I just need to do it more often. She's probably right. She often is.

But, then there's the fact that I'm just shy anyways and that being not shy is very difficult. Beyond that, I'm also a little anti-social to begin with and a complete introvert. All of which pretty much means the same thing. For me, and those like me, it means I have limitations. There is a threshold to how much interaction I can handle. I feel like most days that threshold is relatively small and that by the time the work/school day is over. I'm done.

Most days, that's okay. I can go home and be with my wife and my kids and recharge and feel better and be ready to do it all again. Sometimes I even need reprieve from them. Times when I simply need to be alone, just me and my thoughts and nothing else. I think everyone must feel this way on occasion, but for me (and those like me) it happens more frequently. Please don't take offense. We emerge eventually, refreshed and ready to begin to process over again.

Recently, I've had more time to myself. The last several months have been spent at school and very little time at home and even when I am home, I'm working. I set a small part of each Saturday, and Sunday in it's entirety, aside for my family. Only them. That time is coming to end. I will be home more often now and have more time on my hands for family and other projects.

(This is the part where I unashamedly plug myself as a developer)

If you or someone you know are looking into setting up a website, I would be thrilled to freelance for you. Reach out to me if you're interested and want more details.

So that's about it. The last month. Finishing school, which ends next week, an upcoming job as a mentor for the upcoming class, and freelancing on the side.

(Also, working on moving this blog over to my own website, which will be much prettier.)

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